Getting triplets to sleep….

Posted on March 23, 2010. Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , |

Ques:

Hi, my name is Nur. I’m from Turkey. I like your site and find it very helpful for the parents with multiples. I asked your help about breastfeeding my triplets before and you tried to help me. I really appreciated your help. Now I have a different problem with my triplets. They are one year old now and as they grow older, their sleep patterns change into more individual ways. Each baby now has different sleeping needs. During the day time there is no nap routine any more. I know they are tired but they don’t sleep more than one hour during day time. They wake up  ten or fifteen minutes after I put them in their beds. At nights mostly one baby wakes the others up too. Is separating the rooms a good idea? Can you give some suggestions on settling my babies? Thanks for all.

Suggestions:

Hello Nur, How nice to hear from you again.  I have a few ideas for you to try.  Yes, separate your kids if you can or if space is short, keep the two together who are willing to sleep the longest, but the best for everyone is for each to have their own space.  I am not sure of the sexes of your babies, but if you have a mixture, you would need to eventually separate them anyway, so why not now when you need them to sleep?  As you are putting them to bed, have quiet time at least one hour before they go to bed.  Half hour might work as well – you know your kids best.  This is quiet time, perhaps a bath and story, perhaps just a story or lying on the floor talking about things around you or telling stories.  No games, no TV, no jumping or running – anything quiet, maybe colouring.  When you put them down, do so lovingly but with a soft  voice, “it is over for today” being the constant saying, and a soft kiss on the cheek or forehead, “I love you”, have sweet dreams and see you in the morning.  Consistency is important so that they always know what to expect and that you are serious.  If you have to go back, just go to the bed, gently rub the back, no words but shhhhhhhhhh – maybe 30 seconds and then quietly leave.  If you need to go back again, do so only to the door of the room, quietly, not words just shhhhhhhh so that they know you are there (sometimes they just want/need reassurance that you are still there) and quietly leave after 30 seconds to 1 minute.  Don’t go back to the bed after the initial time into the room.  Once again both you and your husband need to be consistent and then they know you are serious.  If they wake after 15 mins., I would leave them there for as long as you can that is reasonable so that they know you will not reward them with your presence immediately and that they need to learn to comfort themselves.  The more multiples in the group, the more difficult it is for them to have the space to be alone.  Being alone doesn’t hurt anyone and it is really helpful when we can each learn to entertain ourselves and also be alone, even for a little while.  If we didn’t, we would never read, for example, because you need to do that by yourself.  I know adults who were entertained their whole lives as young children and they cannot and will not be alone, making it very difficult for them and their partners.  I would love to hear how things work out.  All the best, Lynda

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